There are times, like yesterday when I was sitting and staring out at the sea, that I realize I'm probably not going to remember that moment forever. So I just try to take in as much as I can. I breathe more slowly. I am amazed by the eagles flying overhead and how red the mountain ash berries have become. The way Patrick keeps sniffing the air like he's receiving a special message. All you can do is enjoy it. Really enjoy it. Let it wash over you. Because chances are, in a whole lifetime of moments, that moment will be lost.
Each day is made up of so many of these moments. Some special. Some not quite so special. But then there are those moments that remain vivid. Special hashmarks along the time line that makes up our lives. Like the other day...
...I was pretty cranky. I had decided I should go for a run. Wouldn't you know it? I couldn't find my headphones. Well, this was almost enough to stop me in my tracks. Almost. I was so cranky my stubbornness took over. I would not let the missing earphones stop me from my running, dammit!
Substitute earphones jammed over my ears, along with an orange wool cap, I set off.
As I headed toward Dog Island, I saw it. The most gorgeous, full rainbow. And it seemed to be growing more brilliant with each second. I kept looping around the cul-de-sac so I could enjoy it, pausing every once in a while to just stare at the rainbow spanning from Deer Island way over to Campobello. I usually don't meet many cars on my run, but folks seemed to want to catch a closeup of this afternoon treat. And Dog Island was a most supreme viewing spot.
Seeing this rainbow, at that moment in time, had a profound effect on me for some reason. Maybe it was hormones. Maybe it was the endorphins kicking in from my run. Who knows? But as I witnessed that rainbow and the light play on the golden trees of Campobello, I felt so good.
Do you ever have those moments when all is right with the world? When you feel you are at your very best? Well, I was having one of those moments. I could feel my resilience, strength, power, love, wisdom, compassion, and a deep sense of faith in all that is good in the world. The certainty that everything was going to be okay.
I've had other moments like this. Moments that I can only describe as spiritual. Oftentimes they happen in nature. Like the time in New Mexico when the wind was bending our tent poles so severely that we had to camp out under the stars. I will never forget looking up into that huge sky, smiling like a loon as the wind washed over me and told me secrets about my life. How my life would be full of good fortune and love.
Other times, the moments don't happen in nature, but are just as profound and will stay with me forever. Like the time I told my future husband, just days after we met, that I was absolutely and insanely crazy for him (in a good way!). I can't remember another time in my life where time actually stood still.
When I held my sons in my arms for the very first time, I was completely at peace and so certain of my love and my ability to care for and nurture these little boys. Given the fact that I had had virtually no experience with children or babies meant absolutely nothing. These babes in my arms just felt so right.
Remembering these moments helps me. When I am feeling not so resilient or hopeful, these memories are my touchstones. They remind me how good and powerful I can feel and how much love there is in this world. They remind me of my strength. And they remind me that even a simple life lived on a small coastal island is full of adventure.