Monday, January 2, 2012


I haven't been that inspired lately to share my thoughts on the interwebs. But today is different.

It's the beginning of a new year. And the twelfth year of our marriage. Is it really possible that another whole year has passed

We spent a lovely day together yesterday, the two of us, hiking to the spot where we got married. It's such a dramatic spot on the coast and never disappoints, even without the sun. I was feeling lucky, hopeful, and happy.

But my gratitude for Heron actually hit me pretty hard this morning when I awoke to a sink full of his beard hair.

Who else would make a Christmas  feast of Scotch eggs? Yeah, that's my man!
Now, this may sound a little gross to some of you. And it kinda is. But he's been talking about trimming his beard for awhile now (despite my protests) and he obviously decided this would be the morning. He even woke me to before he hurried out the door for work to show me how he looked. I'll admit, it does look nice, despite my preference for the more bushy look.

Anyway, I guess he was in a hurry, because the discarded hair was all over the sink when I hauled myself to the the bathroom this morning. I'll admit, I was a bit shocked to see the beard leftovers. Usually he's pretty good about cleaning up.

Hamilton Cove January 1, 2000

Hamilton Cove January 1, 2012
And that's when I took a real moment to reflect on our relationship. The give and take of a loving relationship means that it's okay to leave your beard hair in the sink. Or dirty laundry on the floor. Over the years, we've learned to cut each slack (lots and lots of slack) and give each other a break. We do our best to give the other person the benefit of the doubt and realize it's the other stuff that matters. The really important stuff. Like the way he shoves the dishes out of the way, without complaint, before he makes his family dinner. Dishes I should have taken care of. It's the way he sees the big picture, and how active and amazing his mind is. It's how he never judges me or makes me feel stupid. It's how I feel safe with him and how patient and wonderful he is with out son. How patient and wonderful he is with me. And let's face it, it's how he looks at me and holds me after all these years together.

These things, and so much more, are worth putting up with a little beard hair in the sink. So I scoop up the hair and toss it in the garbage. And I look forward to seeing him when he gets home.